Tenant

I’m never going to dig myself out of this mess. Goodbye, reasonable life of old. Can’t say I’ll miss you. But at least I had an illusion of control over you.

Couldn’t bring myself to leave my room while I-330 was out there yesterday. Frightened that if I did, I’d have to talk to her…. And that was a bit intimidating. Instead I tried waiting her out, hoping she’d eventually, I don’t know, go away? Stupid idea. Worked about as well as you can imagine. I gave up after the sun set and I was starting to get tired. Locked the door and went to bed, hoping that everything would be somehow fixed when I woke up the next morning.

Which brings us to this morning, when I woke up to the totally unfamiliar sounds of someone using the kitchen. Confusion doesn’t go well with sleepiness, so even after walking to the kitchen, it took me a while to figure out what I was looking at. I-330 was standing over the stove, cooking something. No longer in her fancy suit and tie, though I still have to wonder what type of person wears long sleeves when it’s 70 degrees outside (where did she get the change of clothes? She wasn’t carrying any luggage with her that I saw).

She smiled and greeted me. No one should be allowed to be that happy before 9 AM. No one. Told me she’d gone out shopping while I was asleep, and was making crepes. Before I could question any of this, she handed me a plate and dished up several for me. Then I, still horribly disoriented, was led by her to the table. She sat down next to me, and started to talk. Emphasized how sorry she was about what I’d had to go through. I just nodded and mechanically ate my crepes. Didn’t have a clue what I was supposed to say in that situation.

Then she told me that she was looking for a place to stay in the city, and wanted to know if she could rent a room. Why does she always have to say these things while there’s something in my mouth? I don’t want to die choking on crepes….

Before I could finish coughing and say something, anything to try and get this conversation under control, she pulled a check out of her pocket and said that she was willing to pay her first few months rent in advance.

That check had… a very impressive number on it. Lots of zeroes. More than I’ve ever seen on any check handed to me before. I must have mumbled something, because she thanked me, then ran back to the kitchen to clean up.

I’m so confused. I can’t tell her she has to leave now…. But I’m not sure I really agreed to let her stay…. So I guess this means I have a tenant now? Somehow?

-Lisa